#20: Watch Grey Gardens (a review)

So last night I was supposed to have a few people over for wine and snacks, but snow started falling around 4:00 PM and my guests called soon after they left their house to say that the roads were impassable.  Since #22 (Entertain) wasn’t in the cards, I decided to take advantage of a free evening by ticking #20 (Watch Grey Gardens) off the list. 

Why Grey Gardens?  A few reasons.  First, PBS lists it as number one in its list of “100 Greatest Documentaries.”  I hold this ranking in high esteem, mostly because it’s PBS, and PBS brought us Mr. Rogers and the Dust Bowl.  Can’t argue with that. 

Second, documentaries are the only movies that I have the patience to watch.  During fictional movies I’m constantly checking my watch or just plain falling asleep.  Until a few weeks ago I was on a 19-month streak of not having been to a movie theater.  I only broke this streak because Donnie lied to me and said Inside Llewyn Davis was a documentary.  False!  

Finally, I am intrigued by people that live in dirty houses.  To me, there is something seriously interesting about people who can just not give a damn about filth.  What allows for that?  I want to know more! 

So I poured a glass of wine and settled in.  Donnie called this a bowl of wine, but whatever:

Actually, he called it my third bowl of wine.  But who’s counting?  

Apparently he was.

For the record, this third bowl ended up being too much to finish, so I poured it back in the bottle.  Maybe this is why we don’t have guests more often.

Anyway, Grey Gardens is a peek into the lives of Edith Bouvier Beale (Big Edie) and her daughter of the same name (Little Edie) who were the aunt and first cousin Jacquelyn Kennedy Onassis.  The mother and daughter live together in a crumbling mansion in the Hamptons with a hundred cats and no running water.  When the filmmakers arrived in 1975, the twenty-eight room house had just been spared from condemnation.

The documentary captures the former socialites-turned-recluses eating butter pecan ice cream straight from the carton and feeding Wonder Bread to the raccoons living in the attic.  They sing, dance, fight, and look at old photographs of themselves.  But they also say some really profound things, such as:

“It’s difficult to keep the line between the past and the present.”

“You can’t get any freedom when you’re being supported.”

“It’s very hard to live nowadays.”

“Everyone thinks and feels differently as the years go by.”

And my personal favorite: “I did have my cake.  I loved it, masticated it, chewed it and had everything I wanted.”

I think I found a new motto. 

About halfway through, Donnie and I paused the movie to have a little ice cream break ourselves and we had the following exchange:

Me:  Hey, what percentage of me do you think is bat shit crazy like those ladies?

Donnie:  15%?

(No response from me)

Donnie:  Too low?

What a guy. 

By nine o’clock the movie was over and I ceremoniously crossed out #20 on my “This is the Year” Excel sheet.  Of course there is an Excel sheet.  As Big Edie would say, "Listen, Kid! I'm extremely organized."


-K.